This is a blog post that I deeply feel as if the Holy Spirit has been convicting to me write since Thursday August 11, 2016. I have friends that I deeply truly miss and love their faith in God. Both of these friends challenge me daily and help me grow closer to God even though we do not live in the same towns anymore. Thank God for technology and the app voxer. But this blog is something I wrote in my first couple of years of accepting the gospel. This is a blog for all the people that truly trust in God but struggle with being single. Not only being single, but for those that are thinking about life decisions. Hope you enjoy and if you like it please share and subscribe and follow me on twitter.
My honest prayer for all that read this is that after reading this blog you feel at peace. What ever decision you are trying to decide in your life at the moment. That God will use you in mighty ways and that you see a clear passage with no turns for where you are meant to go. God be with us as we continue on this journey to get closer to you we love you and praise you.
“Father, I come to you crying from the inside. To figure out what is wrong with me. I believe you have called me to celibacy, but I am not for sure say that you have. Almighty, you know what your desires are in my life. All I ask is that you make me follow you. I want you to be the player of a chess game and I just be one of the pawns.
But God all I want to do is just love you Lord, and ask if you can for sure give me a correct answer on what to do. I just want to know if I really am. Father I also ask that you make sure I keep daily devoted in your word, and you make me do this everyday. I love you so much and I adore you for that. There is so much on my mind right now it is insane.
I know you will tell me in your own time but Abba I ask that you give me an answer to these concerns. I do not know what to do Yahweh I really do not. I am seeking your will father what am I supposed to do? Are you calling me to be single? If so I do not care anymore Lord, I will serve you till you reunite me with you. Then I still want to glorify and worship you I do not care to see loved ones.
But there are two things driving me insane right now is it your will I stay at Campbellsville University? I feel like your spirit that you sent us is telling me to leave but I do not know. My life is starting to get stressed with so much pain, father I ask that you ease my mind and take this stress of of me. I have seen the one vision of me in South East Asia father or so I presume. Right now Father I am so ready to go for sure into the field. But I feel as if my doctrine and theology is not fully equipped to go out.
Lord, I also ask you you slowly change me into being better equipped when trying to express your word to others. Definitely when they do not want to believe in you or if they disagree with me. I ask of you to give me more grace, patience, and most important un-laziness. Lord, change me please Alpha and Omega I want you to be my beginning and my ending each day of my life. I sound so selfish right now father but I feel like I need you now more than ever.
I ask that you just help me quit asking all of these questions. I know your will, will be done no matter what. Father, please just give me some clarifying on what to do. You are my life I love so much Amen.
The answer to this prayer happened in Hebrews 12:25. I am taking this verse out of context a little but I feel the Holy Spirit speaking to me. God started showing the gospel to us through the flood that wiped out the earth in Genesis. Noah was criticized and people thought he was crazy. God’s judgement had to come then and it will come again. God knew it from the beginning that we would miss up. So since then He has tried and tried to get us to come back to Him. He loved us His creation even though we messed up he still wanted us back. Before the Resurrection ever came to be.”
This is meant for those that are struggling with finding God’s will in their lives at the moment. But also for those that feel deep down is God calling me to be single or not? God will answer in time do not worry about that. But this blog is to show that God is a God that takes care of us but also a God that will answer prayers. The journey of following a God that calls us to go and tell others is a journey that will not end until we are in the grave. This journey does not and should never stop with me or should stop with you. We must be willing to be bold and proclaim his great name. This is the God that we serve, this is the God that is willing to use sinners for his name to be proclaimed.